January is National Child-Centered Divorce Awareness Month

FOR IMMEDIATE RELEASE

Dec. 9, 2019

 

CCDG’s Divorce Experts Recognize ‘Children Are More Precious Than Any Possession’ and Offer Services & Resources to Prioritize the Needs of Children

HARTFORD, Conn; Dec. 9, 2019 – The month of January tends to see a spike in divorce filings, so it is no coincidence that January is recognized as National Child-Centered Divorce Awareness Month, a time dedicated to alerting parents about the effects of divorce on children – and how to prevent emotional and psychological damage to children during and after a divorce.

Children end up in the middle of many divorce cases, and when the parties are angry, that anger spills over and affects the children. In hotly contested cases, the warring parties are sometimes looking out for what is best for them and not what is best for the children. Those decisions have profound effects on children for the rest of their lives. And in some cases, people try to keep unhappy marriages together for years expressly for the sake of the children.

“For most of us, our children are more precious than any possession could ever be,” said Abby Cole, Ph.D., a Divorce Coach and Clinical Psychologist with the Connecticut Collaborative Divorce Group (CCDG), a Hartford-based group of professionals that aims to keep divorcing couples and their children out of court using a method of family conflict resolution called Collaborative Divorce. “For children, collaborative divorce is far superior to litigated divorce, because their parents are encouraged to work together rather than fight against each other. They are not scarred by ugly scenes, nor are they encouraged, directly or subtly, to hate either parent. They are free to go forward and love both parents, feeling safe in both homes, and savoring the precious innocence of childhood.”

Collaborative Divorce is arguably the best approach to divorce when children are involved. With a collaborative team made up of a lawyer, a financial expert and a mental health specialist, everyone works to be on the same page to promote a peaceful situation that can breed cooperative co-parenting, and parents can create an individualized and detailed collaborative agreement that best suits their family’s needs.

“A collaborative divorce can help prioritize the physical and mental health of a child by reaching a parenting plan that addresses the best interests of the child through honest, safe interaction between the parties and members of the team,” added Frederick F. Ward II, an attorney with the CCDG. “It is significant for an attorney to recognize that a divorce can be more difficult when a child is involved because emotions of the parties are involved at a very stressful time in their lives. The advantage of a collaborative divorce is that the parties are able to craft their own resolution in a non-adversarial process with the assistance of the team of trained professionals.”

Unlike a litigated divorce, Collaborative Divorce gives couples more control over the outcome of their separation. Rather than having a judge decide the family’s future through litigation, Collaborative Divorce allows couples to make flexible agreements that address the financial, psychological and legal aspects of divorce. In addition to often being less expensive than a litigated divorce, Collaborative Divorce takes the entire family into account.

“The voices of the children may also be carried to the divorce team through mental health professionals who are experts in child development,” Cole said. “The collaborative team works hard to support parents in their transformation from angry or unhappy spouses into civil and respectful co-parents, which shields children from the most destructive aspect of divorce. Rather than crucify parents for past mistakes, we educate parents about best practices going forward in two homes, and we support parents in their own growth processes post-divorce.”

To learn more about collaborative divorce process, visit www.ctcollaborativedivorce.com.

CCDG members are available for in-person and telephone interviews.

About CCDG: Connecticut Collaborative Divorce Group is a group of experienced divorce professionals, including divorce and family lawyers, financial and mental health professionals who have been specifically trained in the collaborative process. Each member of the group has made a commitment to the goals of collaborative practice in order to help people achieve fair and lasting settlements without using the court or even the threat of court. Additionally, each member attends regular meetings and training sessions designed to develop and enhance their collaborative divorce skills. For more information visit: www.ctcollabrorativedivorce.com